


Thy soul shall find itself alone

by NightingalesAndHandGrenades (NightingalesAndLions)



Category: Billions (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-31 11:11:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6467908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightingalesAndLions/pseuds/NightingalesAndHandGrenades
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Be silent in that solitude<br/>Which is not loneliness -- for then<br/>The spirits of the dead who stood<br/>In life before thee are again<br/>- Edgar Allan Poe</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thy soul shall find itself alone

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Billions and this has been written as a work of fiction to celebrate the show.

In another reality he should have felt different. He knows that there is a circuit in his brain that has stopped working and Wend is the only one who can fix him. He trusts her, reaches out to her and, ultimately, allows her for those couple of hours to be the only woman in his life. 

It is a strange feeling, he muses later. He loves his wife, but she can't give him what he needs. He needs to stop failing himself, his business. Bobby Axelrod has a reputation to upkeep, but he also has promised himself, that nothing in the world is going to be able to stop him from reaching the top and staying there. He will never again in his life is going to eat other people' s table scraps.

He slides out of bed and dials Wendy's number. The need to see her is overwhelming. He glances at the clock. Midnight. perhaps this is not the best time to call after all. He thinks of her eyes and the tone of voice she sometimes uses when she thinks Bobby is panicking inside, or trying to avoid truth he doesn't like.

After the third ring he stops trying. Sends her a text. Maybe going for lunch the next day is a better solution. Bobby feels restless, the earlier hours of peace are gone. He needs to understand what is happening in his head, because his current behavior goes against everything he has built with Lara. Besides, Lara could kick his ass in no time.  
The fact that she understands is somehow making it worse. 

His relationship with Wendy is subtle when they are off the clock and patient-therapist terms. It doesn't happen nearly as often as he would like, but he also understands. They are on different grounds, that, like the the big continental land masses, drift in the ocean, but never touch. 

Bobby knows that some things are better seen not touched, and he fully believes it. There is a spark in her eyes every time they actually talk about anything else besides work and their problems or significant others, and actually talk about something interesting for a change. There have been occasions when it has seemed so easy to reach out for a touch. And yet, he has stayed away, admiring her from a far, like a beautiful sculpture.

_Now are thoughts thou shalt not banish --_  
Now are visions ne'er to vanish --  
From thy spirit shall they pass __


End file.
